Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Steiner Discovers Capable Father

I have been actively ignoring Leslie Morgan Steiner since last week, when decided her whole "Mommy Wars" thing was passe. Among the things I ignored was a blog posting from Steiner on her blog asking for the perspective of some fathers. I was thrilled to see that almost no one commented on that post, which seemed appropriate given her repeated dadbashing.

So I was more than a little surprised to read her blog yesterday and see it had been given over entirely to an at-home dad telling his story in his words. It's a wonderful little piece, forwarded without snark, and the most damning criticism anyone raised in the comments was that the dad, Max from Milwaukee, seemed to be painting an overly rosy picture. (The other criticism that was raised involved whether Max's story -- which Steiner called "so interesting" -- would have been considered all that blog-worthy if he'd been a woman.)

Update: Contrast the Max post with today's entry, in which she tells her husband "You're just not as good at the childcare stuff as I am." I know we're in the realm of the anecdote, but it's another blow to the idea that fathers are perfectly good parents.

For some insight into how today's families are making the at-home dad decision (and what life is like), this extensive interview with two at-home dads in the Newburyport (MA) Current is well worth the read. It all sounds so matter-of-fact, and I dream of a future in which all families make their choices about childcare in the same gender-neutral way that these two families approached it.


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